All of our Family & Friends -
Our son, Declan Murphy Stich, was stillborn Thursday, December 6th at 3:22pm. He
was a beautiful 4 pounds 15 ounces and 18.5 inches, just the right size for a
baby of 37 weeks.
It was discovered at Dayna's Wednesday morning checkup that Declan's heart had
stopped beating. He must have passed away between midnight and nine o'clock,
because we both felt his movements the night before. We decided to induce her
labor on Wednesday night. Dayna's labor was short and Declan's delivery was
without complication. Dayna is healthy and beginning the process of recovery.
We were able to keep Declan with us for several hours after his birth. He was so
perfect - absolutely perfect with no sign of distress or problem. We
will cherish those precious few moments with our special little boy forever. We
took photographs of our own, but we also had a photographer from Now I Lay Me
Down To Sleep (a volunteer organization) take images for us so we may share this
experience with everyone. We've attached several select pictures from our
camera, and we understand if anyone is uncomfortable or uneasy viewing these.
The camera does not do Declan justice, he looked very much like a normal
sleeping baby.
We are, of course, completely distraught. However, our memories of the time we
did have with Declan are raising our spirits. The hospital staff did some
wonderful molds of his feet and cut a lock of his hair, so we do have some very
physical momentos of him.
Many people have asked about his name. Declan is a VERY Irish name meaning "Full
of goodness". The most famous bearer of the name Declan was St. Declan, an early
Irish saint who preached in Ireland prior to the arrival of St. Patrick.
I wish I had an explanation as to why Declan has died so unexpectedly, but
hopefully a limited autopsy and the results of a large battery of tests will
shed some light. However, most fetal deaths like this simply have no
explanation. Dayna's pregnancy was completely normal and without complication,
and there were no indications that anything like this could happen. We do hope
to determine if there may be problems with future pregnancies or if there is a
genetic disorder that could have caused a problem.
While we will grieve for Declan and the life we've lost with him, we both feel
that life must now move on. We understand that many of you will have questions
or want to talk about what has happened, please don't hesitate to speak with us.
It has probably been just as hard, or even harder, experience for all of you
that don't have the details or latest news. We appreciate your grief for our
loss and hope that this email and future conversations with us can assuage the
anguish that you may feel.
We would like to thank everyone that has called, emailed, sent flowers, provided
a meal, or even just given us space during these past few days. We would
particularly like to show our appreciation for the professional services
provided by the nursing staff at Providence Hospital (Marcie & Tricia), Dr.
Allison Gibbs & Midwife Tonya Kirk from Anchorage Women's Clinic, photography by
Janna Maile (http://www.photoartsak.com)
from The Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep Foundation, Evergreen Mortuary (http://www.evergreenfuneral.com),
and Dayna's brother Matt for fabricating Declan's urn.
We ask that anyone who feels a need to make a contribution on behalf of our
experience please consider a donation to The Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep
Foundation. The web page for donations is:
http://www.nowilaymedowntosleep.org/pageDisplay.php?page=42
While we've tried to include everyone that we touch in our daily lives as a
recipient of this email, we don't have addresses for many friends or
acquaintances. Please forward this to anyone that you feel needs to receive it,
and we apologize if anyone receives this message more than once.
All our love - Steve & Dayna
--
Steve Stich
Dayna Murphy